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Movies are odd aren't they? They come along, some are destined to be classics, some get a second life on video as "cult" favorites, some just bomb or some are such a specialty that they are seen by a select few and wallow in obscurity. But it is always they same thing from the filmmaker. "No one ever sets out to make a bad film." Whether it be Orson Wells, Steven Spielberg or John T. Bone, we always hear that same phrase. I wonder if I could track down the maker of The Geek, he would have that same response. The Geek, made by no one, starring no one, well no one but a guy in a Bigfoot suit fashioned from brown corduroy slacks and a tweed coat.

The Geek is a porno film. A porno film like I, myself, had never witnessed when Jumpin Joe threw it in the VCR. Is it the only known Bigfoot porno...only Sasquatch knows for sure?

This is basically a Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom gone terribly wrong. Some "nature" lovers head out to enjoy the woods and each other. Sex ensues, hard-core variety, the non-intimate shaving variety. I actually like the look of the bushy butted gals in this thing, unfortunately the fellas look like what the guys in that "Almost Famous" movie would have really looked like in the day. Unkempt flannel wearing goombas. But believe me the person on person sex is not what The Geek is about. After 2 homosapien lovemaking sessions, the crew discovers Bigfoot, the girl approaches, hand outstretched, Bigfoot gets a whiff and he is off to the faces, delivering the goods Bigfoot-style. It is kinda rape kinda not as I have mentioned before the line between consensual and nonconsensual was really blurry in the 60's and 70's and the girls seem to struggle and then kinda grind along...oh well, were you expecting political correctness in a Bigfoot fuck film?

I am putting out this review really to draw attention to films that seem to not have a place anywhere. Why was this made, where was it shown, who saw this, who are these people? All very valid questions. Did a guy show up, pecker in hand ready to get a nut, head back to the office and forget the day's stresses at the grindhouse, when all of a sudden "whaaaahahaa, holy shit" he is trapped watching something he had just seen on "In Search Of" delivering the rather hirsute hump organ. Oddity? For sure. I'd call it the Rubik's Cube of film because by the time you figured out why someone would do this you'd be too damn bored to care. Long live eccentric cinema and the folks who watch the stuff. I guess, and long live you my small weinered, large pedded stank man. You should be proud.

Oh by the way for serious Bigfoot huntin' click

Scarey huh?

ARRARRARRROOOUUUU!!!!!!!

Just Like A Guy Never, Wants To Cuddle.

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Brains On Film 2003