KEEPIN' IT REAL WITH BRAINS ON FILM!
WhuzzzzzzzzzzzzzUp, Y'all! Brother George here. Just tryin'
to keep it real at the Brains On Film Headquarters (my bedroom!
I'm super excited to be talkin' to y'all! After more than ten
years of reviewin' movies and stuff like that, we're still doing
it! Thanks to all of y'all. Really! Y'all are the ones that really
kept us going. I have to admit that when Professor Tread started
rappin' Obout putting Brains on Film on the World Web, I was skeptical
and junk, but when he sat me down in front of that monster Apple
Macintosh Performa 6200 and showed me and stuff, I believed him!
I really did!
And it's all thanks to y'all. I just need to say thanks to ya'll
for sticking with us. Of the all the world webs y'all go to, I
hope ya'll keep pickin' us! Cuz there's lots out there. I hope
I don't sound stuck-up or anything, but I really think that no
one's doing what weıre doing out there. No one! What do yaıll
think? I wanna know!
Cuz ten plus years ago, when we first started reviewin' movies
on public access and then moved to the local Fox affiliate, we
had no idea there'd be such a big response (and later even more
people'd see us.) There was! And we need to find some way to thank
Jumpin' Joe, Professor Tread and me had a "staff meeting" (ha
ha) at the local Applebee's and as you can guess the Natural Light
was flowing! A good time was had by all (Ocept Brother George
who rubbed his eyes after eating a chicken wing. Don't EVER do
that! Ouch!) Anyway, weıre trying to come up with ways to keep
you, our FANS, involved cuz Professor Tread (who's real smart
Obout computers and stuff) says we gotta be interactive with ya'll!
Let's do it, ok?!?
If y'all are wonderin' why I'm so excited Obout us getting'
interactive itıs cuz itıs like a revolution and stuff! Lots of
people don't understand what this world web is about (and worse
than that, they don't understand the Brains On Film!).
Ya'll might not know how tough it is to shoot these shows and
then have to edit Oem real fast and stuff. Add to that trying
to come up with funny things to say in between the clips! Jumpin'
Joe's a great writer and stuff and cuz Professor Tread's on the
radio too, he just seems to say funny things. It's tougher for
Brother George, trying to be funny and research these films. I'm
That's what makes it so tough when people donıt understand what
we do! But you do. Thanks ya'll! So until ya'll come up with ideas
to be interactive with us, I've got a great idea on how we can
Bumper Stickers! That's right. If you're like me, you collect,
read all of Oem you see and everything! Especially the funny ones!
So here's the interactive part! I've come up with a few possible
bumpers stickers. Now here's the interactive part. YA'LL GET TO
PICK THE FIRST ONE WE'LL PRINT! Then we'll send you a free one.
I've included a little bit about why I think each one is good
and junk. So here goes!
(Sweet and simple, like the show. So watch it!)
#2 You Canıt Hold a BONG with Nuclear Arms!
(I fucking hate hippies. You should too. Any chance you get to
knock off one of those smelly Phish fans, go for it! Cave their
fucking heads in. We'll hire Jello's lawyer to defend you.)
#3 Visualize My Dick in your Mouth!
(I really would like a blowjob. NOW!!!!!!)
#4 My Boss is Jewish Asshole!
(Remove the word "Carpenter" and add "Asshole" and it's instantly
and inexplicably hilarious.)
#5 Madonna Fucked My Car!
(I wish she'd go back to fucking herself)
#6 Hate is NOT a family value...FAGGOT!
(I don't get it either.)
#7 Recession? Lets have a War!
(Past generations will thank you for it.)
#8 Bush/Chaney 2001!
(I'm white and I want my fucking money back!)
As you can see, just like my last rant, I'm on the Be-Super-Positive-Hype
Tip, and Iıd like Y'all to do the same! PEACE OUT!